Almost There

I spent a fair share of the night re-re-re-reading my final proof of Let the Dark Speak, and I am so happy to say that barring any unforseen complications, the Paperback Version should go live on Amazon tonight!

Thank you all so much for following along with me, and having so much patience during the publishing process. I could not have done this without the support I’ve received from so many of you.

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Exciting News

The Kindle version of my book is now live on Amazon!

Check it out HERE!

If you’re more of a physical book kind of reader (like me,) you’ll still have to wait a bit for the final proof to be approved.

Here’s a little taste of what you’ll find in the book. đź–¤

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And of course, a loving word for those who need it today:

There are never places light can’t reach. Those of us who dwell in the dark must either thrive there, or strive towards the brightness that emanates from hope. Every hour you survive is proof you have immeasurable strength. Don’t ever give up. You are worth more to this world than your thoughts tell you. I will always be here to listen if you need it.

Lightpost

The First Walk

 

Outside my front door, at the end of my driveway, and 30 feet across the street stands a light post. It’s about 12 feet tall, black, slightly rusty, and it leans a little bit to the right. From time to time, there is a cobweb that is strewn about a few faces of the lamp face. There are seven other light posts up and down the street, but the one across the street from my house is my favorite. And not just for convenience, it has character too.

I take my two dogs to this spot just beside it every day on a walk. One time- a late night walk after work- I was feeling particularly down. A lot of awful, heartbreaking thoughts seemed to dance around my mind, and I was at my lowest. I had been missing you so deeply then, and every heartbeat of mine pumped a darker picture of loss before my eyes, It was in that moment that my light post flickered and then went completely out while I was standing right below it. It hummed at me gently, and I stared at it curiously.

The abrupt darkness distracted me long enough to get a hold of my thoughts, and I felt a calm thankfulness for the light post. As I stared, the humming grew a bit stronger, and then, just as suddenly as it had gone out, it began emitting light once again. The outward hum was no longer audible, but there was a vibration that I could feel in the air- and I swear, that vibration tied me to that light post. I had this confusing desire to stay close to it. So I did for a few minutes longer.

I talked to my dogs while I was there in those moments, close to the light post, but they seemed disinterested in anything I had to offer. My mood had already become much lighter in the few moments that passed in the shadow of the light post, and I began to playfully insinuate to my pets that their favorite Aunt would be coming to visit soon. The light post responded at the end of my statement by flickering a few times and then going out completely. Perhaps the timing was coincidental, perhaps it was not. That’s not for me to suppose just yet, but it did seem that the light did respond directly to my statements.

It then started to rain, so I had to go back inside with my dogs. Still, the peculiar malfunctioning  and the timing of the light post held a strange excitement in my mind. My next walk would be coming up shortly, and I would be ready to see what this light was all about. For now, I could sit on my couch and watch the light post through the windows that faced across the road.

Multi-You-Niverse

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This made my day. A tribute to the multiverse theory. If you’re unfamiliar with the idea, allow me to give you a brief summarization. There are an infinite number of parallel universes, in which some you exist, and some you do not (in some universes you were never born.) In the instances that you do exist, each decision you make branches off into another possible existence of you life, or one like it. For example, you were born here and now, and in this universe and a parallel one your parents were taking you home from the hospital. You come to an intersection where the light turns yellow, and in universe one, you father stops at the light, but in the other, he speeds through. Those small differences cause a skew between our two universes that can have drastically different outcomes. Say running that yellow light in Universe Two causes an accident and your dad gets taken to jail for running a red light. The people in the other car don’t survive, and your father goes to prison for vehicular manslaughter. You grow up wothout a father. Suddenly, universe one and universe two are quite different.
Now, imagine this on an infinite scale, where every decision ever made creates another universe of possiblities; every variable leads to a different outcome. This is the multiverse theory.
It’s a cool idea. Somewhere in existence, you could be a doctor, or a President. You could be a chef, or a father of 20 children. The possiblities are neverending. So why not treat it as a competition. Be the best you there is.

The Lake

I take my steps beside the lake and stare to where the water stops,

and in these moments I adhere to nothing less than broken thoughts.

My dreams, my hopes, they fret among the boughs of trees that fell,

from whence they leaned a touch to far to see their own reflections.

As I drift from meandering want to hapless doubt, I give a smile,

and look to where the bridge will come to take me a little further.

It’s walks like these that give a meaning to all the days and countless nights

that tread upon the mind and lead to furrowed brows and wrinkled foreheads.

For in the bad, we see the good, and in the good, we yearn for more,

Still, steps around this lake can help the years to drift away.

And in these steps I always see what wrongs I have besotted,

as what happiness would come with ease, could evade my every notice.

These very steps still give my heart the courage to think harder,

but truth be told, the less I think, the more I live with candor.